Saturday, November 27, 2010
alright im back
ok down to little more than a week before my surgery, nervous as hell, but cant wait. ever ones coming down likeboth moms and my aunt. just going to miss the money
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
update
quick little update, go in tomorrow (well today) for consult with surgeon. so thank god the balls rolling, now. just want to get everything done now
smile , live laugh and love
david dekle
smile , live laugh and love
david dekle
well need to get this off my chest
well i dont know what it is, could be (no offenice ladys) all the bad women i have been with in my life. But the only way i know how to show my affection is in the bedroom. All ways been told (sorry mom) i have a high sex drive for my age, but here lately with this brain tumor thing, even with the sex drive im cant fuction. i meen its working just body dont. i maybe worried and stressed about this, but thats never really stopped me before. I love my wife with all my heart, but for some dumb reason i think i can only show her how i really feel about her is in the bed room. I mean this is the only woman that when she is hurt, cry, or mad. im effected by it. When shes hurt, i would and will do anything to stop it. When shes crying i would and will be here shoulder. and even if its me, or i didnt do anything wrong if she is mad i will say im sorry.
i know sometimes im not the best hubby in the world but i try.
dont get me wrong ways raised by one of the strongest women i know. but she was new at being the only parent when my father died. so she tryied to be a parent and a friend, so never got that male view on how to show women affection and things.
i know meagans going some things to with this medical issue. being the only bread winner till we get it taken care of. thats why i dont mined cooking and cleaning up. this year alots been asked of her. to her credit she has taken everything with out saying a word. just wish her family was close to her so she would have someone to talk to. dont know if she would talk to me about all this. i think she has the idea i would think she was being selfish. but i wouldnt. this has been a ruff year for us, me health wise her emotion wise.
just wish i could not be going through this. i know im not but sometimes i feel alone. i know meagan is there for me not matter what buti dont want to put to much on her. to me just going through another freaking surgery is enuff on her plate.
just in the last 2 years i have found family, i didnt know i had, cousins that have never met me wishing and worrying about me.
i am so impatient when it comes to things i need done to me. i have watched enough tv and know that a surgery on the brain takes a game plan, i thats what i want, but kept in the loop.
Hope i didnt ofend any
i know sometimes im not the best hubby in the world but i try.
dont get me wrong ways raised by one of the strongest women i know. but she was new at being the only parent when my father died. so she tryied to be a parent and a friend, so never got that male view on how to show women affection and things.
i know meagans going some things to with this medical issue. being the only bread winner till we get it taken care of. thats why i dont mined cooking and cleaning up. this year alots been asked of her. to her credit she has taken everything with out saying a word. just wish her family was close to her so she would have someone to talk to. dont know if she would talk to me about all this. i think she has the idea i would think she was being selfish. but i wouldnt. this has been a ruff year for us, me health wise her emotion wise.
just wish i could not be going through this. i know im not but sometimes i feel alone. i know meagan is there for me not matter what buti dont want to put to much on her. to me just going through another freaking surgery is enuff on her plate.
just in the last 2 years i have found family, i didnt know i had, cousins that have never met me wishing and worrying about me.
i am so impatient when it comes to things i need done to me. i have watched enough tv and know that a surgery on the brain takes a game plan, i thats what i want, but kept in the loop.
Hope i didnt ofend any
long frusraiting productive day
Well had a first visit with surgeron at UT SOUTHWEST. Dr. Bruce Micky dont wish this issues on anyone. but if you every have this issue this is the man to see. He is one of the most patient friendly dr. i know.
Well the bad parts of today, went to this appointment thinking that he had everything(no one every told me different). so when we finally get in cause he had surgery. he does all of the standerd test, for balance and so on then he tells me that he can only go over the report with me since the films didnt get sent. so as frustraited as i was this was a big blow. so he goes over the report, tells me to start slowly droping of the meds. cause they will end up doing more damage then good. tells me that the tumor is 6cm long(thats almost 2.5 inch). big he did say that the surgery has to happen but is not as urgent as the waco dr. say. cause you look at one fact if you take something as big as 6cm and throw it in your head your going to be sick. so it has to be slow growing or i would be sicker than i am.
so he released me back to work, and driving. now tomorrow is going to be really busy. got get those scans to him, deal with short term insurance people.
Back to the gym tomorrow, want to spend like 4 hours there, take my time.
did get to have dinner with some very special friends that moved from kansas, we lost touch for awhile but am so glad we got in contact. BY THE WAY GREAT DINNER KATHY.
Long ride home tonight. Damn MEagans a trooper,wish she could open up about what shes going through.
shes trying to be strong, but makes me feel better if i knew she was worried to.
I really dont know where i would be with out her, when she came into my life i never thought i could love someone this much. shes been through alot with me. and i pray that it never but if this kind of things start happening to her i hope i can be half as strong as shes being now. guess that comes from her mother, besides my mom< Doni Connor is one of the strongest women i know. for one big reason, have seen alot of stuff happen to her, but have never seen her give on anything.
and another good point she loves me even though i took her baby 8 hours away.
Well going to run for now.
Thanks to all for prayers and support,we are at least to basicly set the surgery time. i should here from him by friday, then have more of a positive plan.
SMILE, LIVE, LAUGH AND LOVE
Bleased be to all
DAvid
Well the bad parts of today, went to this appointment thinking that he had everything(no one every told me different). so when we finally get in cause he had surgery. he does all of the standerd test, for balance and so on then he tells me that he can only go over the report with me since the films didnt get sent. so as frustraited as i was this was a big blow. so he goes over the report, tells me to start slowly droping of the meds. cause they will end up doing more damage then good. tells me that the tumor is 6cm long(thats almost 2.5 inch). big he did say that the surgery has to happen but is not as urgent as the waco dr. say. cause you look at one fact if you take something as big as 6cm and throw it in your head your going to be sick. so it has to be slow growing or i would be sicker than i am.
so he released me back to work, and driving. now tomorrow is going to be really busy. got get those scans to him, deal with short term insurance people.
Back to the gym tomorrow, want to spend like 4 hours there, take my time.
did get to have dinner with some very special friends that moved from kansas, we lost touch for awhile but am so glad we got in contact. BY THE WAY GREAT DINNER KATHY.
Long ride home tonight. Damn MEagans a trooper,wish she could open up about what shes going through.
shes trying to be strong, but makes me feel better if i knew she was worried to.
I really dont know where i would be with out her, when she came into my life i never thought i could love someone this much. shes been through alot with me. and i pray that it never but if this kind of things start happening to her i hope i can be half as strong as shes being now. guess that comes from her mother, besides my mom< Doni Connor is one of the strongest women i know. for one big reason, have seen alot of stuff happen to her, but have never seen her give on anything.
and another good point she loves me even though i took her baby 8 hours away.
Well going to run for now.
Thanks to all for prayers and support,we are at least to basicly set the surgery time. i should here from him by friday, then have more of a positive plan.
SMILE, LIVE, LAUGH AND LOVE
Bleased be to all
DAvid
Monday, November 1, 2010
update
quick little update, go in tomorrow (well today) for consult with surgeon. so thank god the balls rolling, now. just want to get everything done now
smile , live laugh and love
david dekle
smile , live laugh and love
david dekle
well
this first one, and will blog again later. but another day starting off in limbo waitng on the doc. im so nuts.
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